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Sisterhood: how far will you go?

What is the real meaning of sisterhood in Islam? We have all heard about it, but what does it truly encompass? Umm Ibrahim Murtaza shares her experiences of sisterhood.

I was born and raised as a Muslimah and lived in one community all of my life until I got married and moved to another city. Alhamdulillah, I can say that I have felt true sisterhood in both communities. I have had many moments of sisterhood and continue to experience it everyday of my life.

The following are some examples of sisterhood in my life. Some are simple and fun, while others are more serious and require the utmost amount of sacrifice. As you read through these examples, ask yourself: how far will you go for your sister in Islam?

***You have been married for ten years and have four children, mashaAllah. Day to day life barely leaves a spare moment for you and your husband to spend quality time together. However, you have sisters that make it a point to watch your kids every month, so you and your hubby can get to know each other all over again!

***You have awakened with the flu and feel miserable. The sink is full of dishes, the house is a mess and the laundry basket is overflowing. You have no energy to do anything. But, you have sisters who come to your house and help you out with all of your chores so you can rest. And to top it all off, they bring you some nice, hot soup to make you feel better.

***You are so busy with your daily life that you are not part of a study circle. You find it difficult to attend with your children, but realize how important it is to renew your faith on a weekly basis by attending a halaqa. There are sisters in your community who are going through the exact same thing. One day, you all collectively decide to start a halaqa. It is a handful of sisters at first, and held once a week at someone's house. Each week, someone different presents a chapter from a chosen Islamic book. Once you start, you realize that all of the sisters have so much in common and are really going through similar situations and begin to form strong bonds of friendship and sisterhood.

One of the sisters in the community has just gone through a messy divorce. She is having trouble getting back on her feet but is too ashamed to ask for help. A few sisters pitch in and go to her new place to give her some money and help her out. They also come with housewarming gifts and help her unpack and settle into her new home.

**

There is a new sister in the community who is really feeling lonely. The sisters invite her over and visit her often in order to pull her into their circle. She slowly becomes more comfortable and soon feels she can count on her sisters for anything.

**

One of the younger sisters in the community has been heading towards the wrong path. She is slowly spiralling downwards and the sisters are concerned for her. A sister meets her one day for a coffee and by the end of their meeting, that sister is in tears over her companion's advice. May Allah guide her to the straight path.

**

You go out of town for a weekend with your family and contact a sister to give you the address of halaal restaurants in town. She does that, but also has you over to her house for dinner and talks you into spending the night at her place as well. Never are you made to feel like a burden, rather you are treated like royalty.

**

*** It's 3 o'clock in the morning and you get a call from a sister in need. She has been down and depressed lately and needs someone to talk to. You ask your husband and with his permission, go to her place to offer a shoulder to cry on and some sound advice.

**

Your husband wants to take a second wife. Although this doesn't come as a major shock to you since you have discussed it before, it still hurts. You know of a sister in the community who is a single mother trying to make ends meet. You have a feeling that she might be your husband's type. Even though it kills you inside, you suggest the idea to your husband and before you know it, you've got a co-wife, sister and best friend all at the same time.

Now it is one thing to stop by and offer a sick sister some chicken noodle soup, but completely different to share something as precious to your heart as your husband. So just how far are you willing to go for your sisters in Islam?

It is important for us to remember the following verse from the Quran (3:103-105):

And hold fast, all of you together, to the Rope of Allâh (i.e. this Qur'ân), and be not divided among yourselves, and remember Allâh's Favour on you, for you were enemies one to another but He joined your hearts together, so that, by His Grace, you became brethren (in Islâmic Faith), and you were on the brink of a pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus Allâh makes His Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.,) clear to you, that you may be guided.

I know that I have felt sisterhood in my life. May Allah reward all of those sisters who have cared for and loved me for the sake of Allah. It is my sincere hope that all of us experience the sisterhood that lies within each and every one of us.

This article was published in the first issue of SISTERS.

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